Focusing On The Things That Keep Us Watching

And The Wait Begins…

Good morning, Heartbroken.

I will warn you all that I can barely see the screen as I type because my eyes are so puffy and swollen from crying. 😦

The scenes of the breakup took such a sharp turn towards sadness and heartache, that I was honestly caught off guard at how much they affected me. I was not just crying, or even weeping. I was sobbing (as my son, Matt, told everyone who came home after GH). At one point, I finally got myself under control, and then out of nowhere, I was in tears again. Finally, I just jumped in the shower so that I could finally cry my eyes out without making my kids worry.

I must be honest and say that I hated the fact that they even mentioned the word divorce, and that we are supposed to believe that both Jason and Sam seem to feel that they are “doing the right thing”, mostly because the Jason and Sam that we know and love, and became Mr. & Mrs. Morgan found out long ago exactly what life was like without the other. They would never think walking away from each other was the right idea. NEVER.

That being said, I must say that I hope you can all see through the tears and the pain and the stupidity, and focus on the fact that no matter what was said…this was not so much an ending as it was a beginning.

Yes, that’s right. I said beginning. I watched the end of those heart wrenching scenes and thought, “And The Wait Begins”…

Let me preface what I am about to write with this: I HATE THIS STORYLINE. I HATE THAT JASON AND SAM HAD TO BE TORN APART, KEPT APART, AND PUSHED APART SOME MORE ALL SO THAT THERE WOULD BE ROOM FOR JOHN MCBAIN. THAT HAS NOT CHANGED.

HOWEVER...you all know that this blog is, and has always been, about finding The Beauty Of GH, even when that job is comparable to finding a needle in a haystack, as it was today. But find it I did, as I am sure most of you positive-minded people did as well.

The Beauty Of GH for me amidst all of that heartache was…well…just that: All That Heartache. Never before have I seen a breakup be so conflicted and confusing that I myself was trying to follow along. (Of course, having all new writers who are as good as strangers trying to write the breakup of GH’s most enduring couple of recent years might have had something to do with that, but I am trying to focus on the positive)

I am choosing to believe that Jason and Sam are at a complete loss for how to handle this impossible situation. One minute they’re talking about trying and counseling and the next, they are convinced that divorce is the only option. How could it possibly make sense in what they were saying, when we all know it doesn’t make sense in what they are doing?

The only thing that made sense to me about those scenes and their dialogue is that in everything, each was thinking about the other first, even at the high cost to their own heart. That’s the kind of love that made Jason and Sam the Supercouple they are. That’s the kind of love that made them the first TV couple I invested in with my heart. Yet, sadly, that’s the kind of love that sometimes blinds you to the point of not seeing your mistake.

If Jason and Sam had dared to fight for what each one wanted, their conversation would have ended very differently. Instead,we heard a lot of  “What do you need?”, “I couldn’t do that to you”, “I thought this is what you wanted”, and “I would rather let you go than to see you hurting”.

If either of them had dared to show just a little selfishness, we might have heard,“I know it’s gonna hurt, but I need us to get through this together.”

It was so devastatingly sad to hear Sam tell Jason that he was more than her husband; he was her best friend, and for Jason to say it was the same for him. Wasn’t that one of the magical ingredients to their perfect formula? *wipes tears* I know that some were upset that Jason said that maybe they can’t be friends; especially when he remained friends with all of his exes. I just wish those who were upset by that would realize that when you love that big and that deeply, you can’t pretend to be okay with anything less. I thought that comment spoke to the immensity of their love for each other, and to how incomparable their love and relationship is to any other.

Most important to my theory that this is the beginning of a wait, instead of what some desperately-seeking-delusions are calling “closure”, was that when Jason said that they couldn’t go back and they couldn’t move forward, Sam said, “Not while we are feeling like this.” 

They are “feeling like this” because of pain and regret and guilt and even anger over what they both believe was the death of Sam’s baby. Since Sam’s baby boy is about as dead as the depth of their love for each other, I think we have to see that knowing the truth about the baby being alive will release all of those feelings that held them back from believing in their love again.

Most of all, this breakup was nearly impossible for them to accomplish. When they told each other good-bye, but then held on once more and went into each other’s arms before sharing that breathtaking kiss, I felt my heart contract. I could literally feel the love they have for each other, and the sheer agony of what it took to walk away. Jason and Sam left not a single doubt in my mind that they can and will overcome everything once the truth is known. Steve and Kelly convinced me that they have poured their very hearts and souls into this pairing and this story – and they did that for all of us. Even the writers managed to leave me feeling rather certain that once again, they were throwing us a life line in putting together that incredibly amazing montage showing just how good they are together. They could have chosen to show the bad times instead of the good, or the mistakes they made instead of just how right they got it so often. They didn’t. They showed what we already knew – their love has always outweighed anything else.

That perfectly sweet, perfectly JaSam collection of fabulous memories kept me from drowning in a sea of despair on one of the darkest days in JaSam History. It kept me from jumping off the deep end into hopelessness. It kept me from forgetting that JaSam are, not were, One Of A Kind, and they deserve to know we aren’t giving up.

And The Wait Begins…for the next JaSam Reunion, and for their next chapter in this Unforgettable Love Story. 

Let’s wait it out together.

As my wise, dear friend Steph said to me after GH yesterday, “JaSam can only go up from here.”

And I believe her.

Angelique

Your Daily Inspiration: JaSam Montage 8/13/12  http:www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfrB_Ffnkpc Credit: klaineslexitvfan23

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35 responses

  1. Connie Hernandez

    I am a mess as I write this. Never have I been affected by any soap couple, TV couple or any other couple breaking up, the way My JASAM affected me. I was completely drained and lifeless almost after watching them part ways… There is really no way But UP after all that has happened with our beloved JASAM. . Now it’s time to look forward to the REUNION PART 2.
    WaitingWithBated Breath,
    Connie

    August 14, 2012 at 2:30 am

  2. Dawn

    What a day…there are almost no words for what we witnessed happen. My only solice is that when Jason and Sam said “goodbye”, Sam mirrored Jasons often used technique of reaching behind and grabbing Sam’s hand, except this time Sam grabbed Jason’s hand–and Jason grabbed back, and they clasped hands for a small bit of support.

    It is clear that their love is meant to be because even in saying goodbye they spoke it was choreographed like a dance, perfectly in time and perfectly respectful of one another. And when Jason kissed Sam, the thoughts rolling through their heads–the montage that we saw–was not about the heartache, but the impact that meeting the other had impressed upon themselves. The montage was about the strength and support they had gained by going throught Sam’s first pregancy and loosing little Lila, it was about their finding one another again, and their beautiful union as man and wife. There were not any thoughts of all the incredible heartache that they have recently endured, but thoughts of the life changing moments that make life worth living. As Jason left the lakehouse and turned to see Sam collapse within herself, he had the same sadness in his face that he did when she was raped. He cannot heal her, he just needs to give her space.

    I do not think this was a goodbye to their marriage I think it was a goodbye to all of the bad that has happened in the recent months. They never had a chance to breath, let alone process all of the pain, from Franco, to Robin, the revelations about the baby, and loosing the baby. This couple is far from over; they simply need to heal, and no matter how much you love someone else, you cannot heal them, you must heal yourself in order to give and accept love. So, as Angelique aptly phrased it…”And the Wait Begins.”

    August 14, 2012 at 4:52 am

  3. alwaysaromantic

    That had to be the most heart wrenching “goodbye” ever! You could see,feel how these 2 STILL LOVE each other. As Sad as it was it was “amazing” to witness. Kelly and Steve brought their “A” Game AGAIN! I actually watched GH and turned and watched on YT several times! No other pairing touches my heart like Jason and Sam! The Montage was so unexpected yet so on Time! It showed how “right” they are together! I am so looking forward to the Videos that are still to come!
    Its amazing how they STILL were trying to protect the other! But was also clear Jason and Sam always do bettter when they are one on one! I feel its their Friendship that causes that they are so at ease with each other! Not only do they try to say goodbye to their marriage they were trying to say goodbye to their Friendship! Remember when Jason told Sam that his Grandmother told him “that the heart has a LONG Memory”!
    “And the WAIT begins”!

    August 14, 2012 at 6:05 am

  4. user123

    To be truthful, I wasn’t going to watch Jason and Sam say goodbye. I decided to put on my big girl panties and watched it on youtube. It was beautiful. I hated to see them say goodbye but they made me understand why it was necessary. The only way for them to grow was to say goodbye but when Sam asked Jason would he go to couples therapy and he said I will try, I knew there was hope. HOPE is what we need that the writers will writer their time apart and reunion to the level that they wrote their breakup.
    Thank you Angelique for such exquisite words and having a place where we can support each other.

    August 14, 2012 at 6:25 am

  5. This is just not right, why couldn’t they say let’s separate and see what happen, but than again they have been separated for the last 9 month…how can these writers think putting these two with other people will be ok, Liz just like John will be getting a partner that is hurt and angry, and not thinking right, there is no reason for Sam and Jason to be apart, i can’t stand this crap…i need my JaSam now.

    August 14, 2012 at 6:40 am

  6. Dear Angie,I have finally stopped crying!!I watched those scenes yesterday and balled my eyes out all evening!!Those scenes were truly heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time!! I don’t think they are really over!!They are in a place where they don’t know what to do,they are hurting so bad and think divorce is the only answer. Kelly and Steve deserve an emmy for their performances!!! You don’t kiss your soon to be ex the way they kissed. Sam was desperate to keep him and Jason was just doing what he though she wanted and neither one wants to hurt the other any more. The way she grabbed his hand when he started to walk away and they hugged and he touched her and they kissed!!The way his lip cwivered when he said good bye was so real. Then their song played!!The words make me believe they are not over. Once they find the baby,Sam will be able to forgive Jason. hopefully Jason can accept her friendship with John.After all he has Carly and Liz!!! Hopefully they won’t get to file divorce papers because of Alexis’ illness and Josslyn gets sick too! The previews show Carly talking to Jason and telling him to fight!Never thought I’d see that day!!But Carly knows that Sam is Jason’s heart. He won’t be happy with any one else!! Now we wait!!

    August 14, 2012 at 6:43 am

  7. lt4bama

    Wow! Yesterday’s scenes were bittersweet. It was hard to watch them say goodbye. The next few times I watched I tried to focus on HOW they said goodbye. I paid close attention to the words they chose, the eye contact or lack of, and the touches. All of it said Jason and Sam are still madly in love, they do not want this divorce and this is NOT the end.
    Reflecting on that has eased some of the pain and taken away some of the anger.

    I found it strange that Sam suggested being friends. I definitely wasn’t mad that Jason squashed the idea. First off most ppl that break up don’t become friends right away, just imagine when your still deeply in love with the person. That can’t happen over night. But jase did say he wanted her happy regardless and that’s typical Jason.

    They couldn’t look each other in the eye to say goodbye, the hug, the way he touched her face, kissed her so gentle and then passionately…that was amazing Stelly magic in true form. Then ILUs before they parted ways, this was just torture on my jasam loving heart. Epeacially when Jase turned back and peered through the window as Sam broke down on the floor. *sigh*

    The montage was beautiful. It was a collection of some of the many jasam clips I’ve been forced to watch over and over on YT especially b/c of the botch job RC has done with our beloved couple. Not one of those moments are from anything this new regime is responsible for. Our couple got their entire song played during an actual show. I think that’s pretty cool.

    I just hope with all the drama coming with Jerry and Heather, Jason and Sam wont really have time to seek comfort in others. And when the smoke clears they will let each other know they can’t, don’t want to and won’t be apart. I have high hopes for the reunion. I hope SBu has been hitting the gym hard. Ohhlala.

    So to my BM jasam family lets hang in there together and believe that jasam will reunite and they’ll have Jason Alexander by their side sometime soon.
    -Bama

    PS I can’t believe JASON MORGAN agreed to marriage counseling. The man who hardly speaks and usually says that talking isnt gonna fix anything was willing to try and share his feelings with doctors ( can you imagine! ) all in an attempt to save his marriage. That was an incredible gesture to show his love for Sam. And for her to not put him through it was her way of doing the same. In the words of Angelique ” Life line”

    PPS: I know ps’s should not be that long. Thank you Angelique for your awesome perspective and for not having character limitation like YT and Twitter for the chatter boxes of the group. In the words of Jason Morgan “ok, I’m done”. 🙂

    August 14, 2012 at 8:05 am

  8. SamJasonsHeart

    Steve and Kelly were amazing yesterday. The scenes were beautiful and heartbreaking. I really can’t find the words to describe how I’m feeling, so thank you Angie for saying them for me! *tears*
    Sam will ALWAYS be Jason’s heart!

    Love you!

    August 14, 2012 at 8:19 am

  9. samjase

    I have NEVER .. EVER..felt more emotion for anything on a soap like I did yesterday. Stelly were AWESOME..SIMPLY AWESOME! They were so conflicted that it was jumping off the screen. Their LOVE for one another was LOUD AND CLEAR. Jason saying they couldn’t be friends absolutely showed that he loves her too deeply for that to happen..unlike with his other exes. I LOVE THEM. ADORE THEM.

    August 14, 2012 at 8:39 am

    • Agree with you!! At first I thought why won’t he be friends? Then I thought because he loves her so much it would hurt to just be her friend and nothing else!!Sam loves him so much she doesn’t want to lose him!1Like she said “Your not just my husband,you’re my best friens!” she losing a husband and a best friend and she doesn’t want to be with ouut him in her life. The way she thanked him for coming into her life was heart breaking!!I hope they never get to file those divorce papers and they realize that they are better together than apaprt. They need time away to think and heal. Once Sam finds out her son isn’t dead,those conflicting feelings will go away and she will know she loves him and wants to be with him and wants Jason to be the father to her son!!!When Jason finds out Sam’s son is alive he will want to be his father!1when he finds out he is the father– look out!!!

      August 14, 2012 at 8:59 am

      • beatrice

        i would be so happy if they get back together before he knows it is his baby…i think that is the least we deserve.

        August 15, 2012 at 10:24 pm

    • beatrice

      i guess if you think about it he does not lie when he says “i have never loved anyone, as much as i love you”…she can’t be placed on the same level as the others, how can he agree to be her friend when his STILL in LOVE with her, how can he watch her talk about dates, with other guys when he still wants her, his in pain right now.

      August 15, 2012 at 10:30 pm

  10. GimmeOGLnL2

    I love all of what you said and I haven’t even read all of your post yet. I watched the JaSam Morgan scenes last night and the entire time I said I wasn’t going to cry…By the montage I was telling myself I wasn’t going to let the tears fall. Stelly was just freakin’ amazing and KeMo’s fall to the ground really did me in. But I like any fan that isn’t delusional knows this is just the waiting game w/ the montage and the reasons they can’t be together (which are man-made). I can’t wait until Sam sees her son for the first time, Jason sees Sam with their baby and (the cherry on top) when he finds out baby boy Morgan is their son together. I know Stelly has to be as anxious as the rest of us!

    August 14, 2012 at 6:33 pm

    • beatrice

      can’t wait to see how they find everything out.

      August 15, 2012 at 10:07 pm

      • GimmeOGLnL2

        I can’t either! It’s just going to be to difficult for JaSam to stay apart then.

        August 17, 2012 at 10:34 pm

      • beatrice

        i know, this is what happenes when you watch a show for a specific reason, JaSam were mine, i would tolerate surrounding stories, but look out for JaSam, now i have nothing.

        August 18, 2012 at 9:35 am

      • GimmeOGLnL2

        I know what you mean, I naively held out hope for original LnL2 when JJ came back and that was utterly trashed. Then I began to like Sam McCall and then Jason and now this. I’m back to yt to watch classic LnL2 & JaSam.

        August 18, 2012 at 9:19 pm

      • beatrice

        Youtube is a good friend right now, that is what is helpping us get our good JaSam fix…i just hate these dumb writers so much.

        August 19, 2012 at 8:28 am

    • GimmeOGLnL2

      Beatrice I just finished JaSam ’05 & up until August of JaSam ’06. Then I’ll go into late ’08 and then into ’09 and then back into the 90’s for my L&L2, lol. YT definitely is a friend of mine.

      August 21, 2012 at 3:48 pm

      • LOL…I am on 6/04 now, they are on Sonny’s island, you know his starting to care for her, but waiting patiently…the good ole days…I hate how much I like this couple…I guess this is why this break is scarey,cause at that time I liked him with Courtney,but was so much happier of course with him with Sam.

        August 22, 2012 at 6:30 am

      • GimmeOGLnL2

        Lol, I know what you mean I feel the same about LL2 and starting to love JaSam leaves me in a similar situation. At least my vacay is dwindling and my mind will be focused elsewhere.

        Also, is it the scene where Sam cocks the gun? Luv that scene! And I also liked Jase with Courtney, it was so much better than Liz/Jase.

        August 23, 2012 at 5:23 pm

      • Yes it is that part with the gun…so cute,first time baby kicked…I can’t tell you how much I hate these writers right now.

        August 23, 2012 at 6:32 pm

      • GimmeOGLnL2

        It’s a feeling I knew all to well under Guza & Garin when it came to my LL2…

        August 26, 2012 at 12:47 am

      • beatrice

        i know writing for a couple for many years can get boring, but only if not done right, if the writers were creative it would not be a problem..some of these writers are lazy, look at the ones we have now, they are ok with rewiting the samething over and over again.

        August 26, 2012 at 8:37 am

      • GimmeOGLnL2

        GOOD NEWS TO ALL JASAMMERS! Your calls, letters and e-mails have been answered! Florencia Lozano is returning to GH September 7th to wrap up the baby story. The writers have caved because initially they were not going to wrap up the story well into next year. RC got this idea from Soap writing legend Bill Bell who wrote long, drawn out paternity stories (to get an idea of this look up Nick and Sharon and faith maternity story on Y&R by Maria Bell).

        SO TUNE IN SEPTEMBER 7TH!!!!!

        You can also look up this article on Daytime Confidential! 🙂

        August 27, 2012 at 4:55 pm

      • Lets hope that is a good thing …these writers scare me, after all they are no longer writing for our couple.

        August 28, 2012 at 1:26 am

      • GimmeOGLnL2

        @beatrice I completely agree with you. These writers can’t stretch a story and be creative to save their lives. It’s a matter of spinning the concept b/c there are only so many arcs in writing. But we as viewers shouldn’t be able to predict a beat or “twist.”

        August 27, 2012 at 5:13 pm

      • I know,you know things suck when you are not looking forward to the so call twist almost always.

        August 28, 2012 at 1:16 am

  11. l m cee

    I have to admit I didn’t watch. After reading all the boards I just couldn’t do it. I was crying just reading the posts. I will watch once they are back together and this is just a distant memory. I found it interesting that Sam didn’t give her ring back so I think that is also a telling sign. My worst fear is that the writers will reunite them at the last possible moment. I am not sure how much longer GH is going to be on and the writers are wasting valuable time. I want them back NOW. Praying that the writers fix this mistake and that they don’t do anymore damage to JASAM.

    God Bless

    August 14, 2012 at 8:38 pm

  12. The waiting game…… This is going to be the most difficult thing I have never done. To wait this out and not be tainted with them both being paired with other people. how can I bare it? When Dool broke up ejami I was sad but came around when they paired Sami with Rafe he grew on me. But I was always praying for a ejami reunion and when they paired Nicole and Ej back together it just never fit. Because even Nicole knew Ej would always love Sami & same for everyone on DOOl. But in manage to watch them both with other people. This the last time they broke up JaSam I was devastated and stop watching. I love elizabeth just not with Jason. When they were young and the puppy love was cool and I was rooting for them but once Rick and Liz got together they fit even with him being a little twisted Rick and Liz fit. Jason was always my favorite. I love him him with keshia and robin and didn’t like him with courtney but I accept them. Those when Sam and Jason meat in the waiting room at the PCPD it was love at first site and even before either one of them knew it everyone one around them knew it. I know everybody talks about how Liz and Jason have this long history and friendship those the friendship has been played up to build this great connection but it wasnt all that they keep saying it was, I being watching GH for manus of years before there puppy love even existed. I get tired of the fans of liason talking about jason and Liz have this great connection yeah right. Jason has never loved Liz the way he loved Sam. Robin came close but not quite. Her love of her life was stone and Jason love of his life is Sam and if the writers try to say it Liz it will be a lie. So I pray they don’t go there. I cried so much that when they didn’t the flash back I thought someone had died. well are they trying to make us except that Jason and Sam are completely over? I will not go quietly in the night. I shall make a noise that JaSam is the best couple since Luke and Laura, Monica and Alan Edward and Lila, Stone and Robin and Brenda and Sonny. Oh yeah Liz and Lucky (JJ) the wait begin!

    August 14, 2012 at 9:48 pm

    • Jason and Liz are ok as friends, and just that.. they suck as a couple,

      August 14, 2012 at 10:18 pm

      • l m cee

        I gree with you sweetbea47. Jason and Liz have no chemistry. They are OK as friends. That is why I will NEVER understand why RC is going this route again. How many times were Jiz paired before Sam even came to town? They have never worked. When they broke up JASAM the first time I think the writers thought JIz was going to be a super couple but they flopped once again. If they have to be broke up why do they have to be paired with other people?

        August 14, 2012 at 10:48 pm

      • I know, we heard Jason say he will not give up on Sam, really he has spent more time with Liz than Sam…these writers are freaking lazy idiots, mostly idiots,they did not even give us a chance,came in and ruin us, I am so mad I sat there and watch the destruction of JaSam,I hope we are given a chance again,I think this writer might have been a fan of LiarSON, and was upset about Jake,so this is payback…as you said LiarSON was given their moment in time it did not work before Sam during Sam and will not work after Sam…Liz is a whore who needs different d##k,that is forbidden to her,she needs SEX,not LOVE…if they want a story for her character, let her be a nurse during the day hooker at night,

        August 15, 2012 at 1:26 pm

      • kathydid53

        That was quite harsh what you said about Liz!!
        But it is true!! I watched when he was with Liz! It was sweet but– . When Jason met Sam– wow!! She is his equal!! Liz and Jason were boring, just cuddle on the couch, kiss and have sex. Plus Liz wanted it to be secret! Sam and Jason Live and love!! They have fun together, they fight and they love!! Sam can fight along side him and take care of herself! She is his soulmate!!

        August 15, 2012 at 1:47 pm

      • beatrice

        The thing with Liz character is that all her stories are the same, you know if she starts talking to a guy, his one in a realationship, and she should not be around him, two, you know she will sleep with them, 3 you know she will be involved in a whose the daddy storyline, 4 you know she is a sneaky little liar, 5 you know she has her men personality and her women personality, this is where around women she is a bitch around men she is sweet, want nothing but what is best for them,till this day i am still surprise Liz has not slept with Patrick yet, notice Patrick is s’posely single but she’s not interested, her goal is Mr. Morgan, the character long before Sam has not been one of my fav…Her behavior to Courtney helpped me realize how i did not really like her, however…i was ok with her friendship to Jason, up untill that ONS, her character in my opinion, should not be with just one man, as she has proven that is not what she wants, look at her with Lucky, listen to her good bye speech to nik as she was riding him and telling him goodbye, she did not fall in love with Nik, he was forbidden and she wanted him, that is her thing going for what she shouldn’t, so i don’t respect her character, i laugh when i hear people say “a love triangle between JaSam and LiarSon” Jason feels obligation to Liz, just as he will have sex with her cause she happens to be a fimilar body, whose been there for him, Liz is looking for what Sam has with Jason it will never happen cause YES JASON loves Liz, BUT he IS IN LOVE WITH SAM, that is what the LiarSon fans do not understand, that is what makes them patheic, they see what is not there,

        August 15, 2012 at 10:01 pm

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